Sex and Validation

Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn't.

Tonight, it didn't.

It's no secret to anybody who knows me that I've been having a crisis of self-confidence recently. And with my all-too-recent return to life outside a hospital ward, I'm feeling rather fragile and, well, useless. All those things that used to occupy my time, uni, work, friends... gone. I wonder whatever happened to the latter?

My attempted reconciliation (ongoing...) with H, and the confusion over my feelings for him (I know I love him, I'm just not sure how I feel about that), coupled with my bizarre and now bordering on destructive and unrequited love (yes, I fear I love him, too?) for my closest friend - it's all taken it's toll. Tonight, I just wanted to stop worrying about what, or who, I want, and feel wanted.

Cue K, an old, erm... "friend." We chatted online for a while, talked about the times we met. I remembered him telling me he liked me, in a way ("You're kinda fit, and you're well good in bed,") so thought I'd give it a go. I asked him if he wanted to meet up tonight, and 20 minutes later he picked me up outside. We didn't quite make it to his place, and ended up instead in a Tesco car park, he did explain that he was ridiculously horny, too. The sex was mechanically awesome, just like it was before - all 5 minutes of it, if that. There was a very awkward moment where he wouldn't kiss me, but it was all totally eclipsed when he proclaimed, "I'm cumming!" and within seconds, pushed me off him, removed the rubber and turned the key in the ignition WHILE zipping up his jeans. Literally a selfish fucker. That's the worst kind of fucker there is.

When I got in, I experienced a whole new situation for me - too horny not to wank, but too pissed off to get hard. Let's see if Devin can cure what ails me...

So yeah... I'm back.

My break from blogging, and from life in general for the past 9 months was unexpected, to say the least. In my absence I've thought many times about the friends I've made through blogging, and the things I've learned about myself, and others here. I wondered if I'd come back to blogging when I was back on my feet, as they say. And I have to say, the e-mails I received through this blog sealed the deal for me, so I'd like to thank everyone who contacted me with their concerns, and kind words. I'll begin posting again within the next few days.

Peace, once again, my friends (and foes).

Frisky Friday

A while ago, Simon recommended that I post some of the stories I've shared with him here, for more unique, fresh content for the blog. Frisky Friday has been on the cards for a while since then, though finding the time has always proved to be a problem. I thought I'd give it a shot this month, and see how it goes. If the response is good enough, Frisky Friday may be a regular feature.

And what better way to kick this off, than to share the story of my first time. The story is in two parts, read them in full on the links below.

"I melted as he pulled closer to me, pressing his cock against mine, grabbing my ass and sliding the length of our shafts over each other through our track pants. His chin rested on my shoulder, and his breath tickled my ear. He pulled at the waist of my pants, and buried a hand inside my boxers, holding the base of my cock. As he held me in his warm hand, my throbbing dick pulsed with new life. He began to move his hand along my shaft in a twisting motion, from my balls to my now slippery, swollen cock head. I was shaking like a leaf."

Read Sweet Summer, Part One here.

"I nestled my head into his shoulder, so we were cheek to cheek as I began fucking my swollen tool into his hot hole viciously. He wrapped his legs around my back, and threw his head back as he moaned."

Read Sweet Summer, Part Two here.